I am sososososososo exceedingly sorry for filling you with shit these past days. I’ve been stressed and confused about a lot of things, and I ate sweets mindlessly. I understand that I can allow a bit of leeway, but lately that leeway has been unacceptably large.
I promise to start filling you with nutritious, delicious foods, starting now. I’m going to drink more water and tea to keep you running smoothly. I’m going to start lifting weights more frequently to make you lean and strong. It’s going to be hard at times, but I promise the pushing and soreness will all be worth it in the end.
If I could get Brain to sit back and stop worrying about everything for a while, it’d be nice. I also need to teach him how to love you, no matter what you look like. He’s the key to this new lifestyle I’m implementing; if he’s doing the right thing, you will change for the better. You guys go hand in hand!

I love you, Body. Even when I’m frustrated with you, I love you and thank you for everything you do for me. You are truly, truly amazing.

Sincerely,
Me